Dating in college was fun. My eyes were on men often, but men dating men was absolutely not a thing that was done – especially at a private Catholic college. And the good news is I truly loved women – I was attracted to them, and really enjoyed dating them.

One day in my Senior year, I got a call my friend, Louie, from our “lunch gang.” This group hung out together during lunch. (We still gather today!)

“Vince,” Louie said, “The Spanish Club is entering the talent contest. We’re going to perform ‘La Bamba!’ I’d like you to play the piano for the group, and my friend Debbie to choreograph the routine. I want the two of you to get together to plan. You’ll LOVE Debbie. I won’t take ‘No’ for an answer.”

I certainly was game. I remembered Debbie. Each time I’d seen her around campus she was either with her brother, Mike who is a year younger than us, or she was surrounded by a group of people – all smiling, laughing, and talking, with Debbie literally in the center of the conversation!

Debbie called me, and I was secretly excited for the call. In addition to making arrangements to meet, we talked for a very long time – maybe an hour or so. She was as fun and interesting as I had imagined she would be.

We met in “the nursery,” one of the practice rooms in the Chiuminatto Hall – a century-old mansion that was converted to the college’s music building. The nursery was wonderfully quaint. It had a low ceiling and beautiful dark oak wooden cabinets with counters that were low to the ground – just the right size, I imagine, for the young children who played in the room in the house’s heyday. There was a beautiful grand piano in the room.

We flirted as we began. We laughed. We continued our conversation from the phone and then began discussing ideas for the song and dance. I was sitting at the keyboard, and she was standing in the curve of the piano - leaning against it and facing me.

I swear the following is true. I looked at her eyes. They were bright, green and sparkling. Then I saw a glow around her body – like some sort of an aura. Then I heard a voice – or had this wonderfully prominent thought - that said, “You will be with this woman for the rest of your life!” Wow! What? I just met her! Can this be true? I always thought stories that I had heard about these “first encounters” were silly. Yet it was happening to me.

Debbie and I began dating each other, and we developed the relationship that eventually led to our marriage. I kept this experience to myself for the longest time. If I shared it too soon, certainly Debbie would believe me to be crazy, insincere, or both!

I loved Debbie in every possible way – emotionally, physically, sexually, spiritually. When I look back, I was still attracted to men. This presented a bit of a dichotomy – and certainly caused me to repress my acknowledgment of homosexual attraction. Back then, the world had less understanding of the fluidity that sexuality presents within humankind. And certainly any understanding that did exist wasn’t acknowledged as acceptable within the Psychology or Theology Departments of a small Catholic college in the Midwest.

But that’s OK with me. My meeting Debbie was Divinely inspired, and humanly arranged by one of God’s living angels named Louie.  In fact, I proposed to Debbie much sooner than she had expected me to. But little did she know that I had been informed from the start that this union was written “in the stars!”

You can imagine that the talent contest performance of “La Bamba” was fabulous!

We didn’t win, place or show, but that’s OK. Because I won something much more valuable – the love of my life and my soulmate, Debbie.